Learn Chinese in 5 minutes

Learn Chinese in 5 Minutes

(Must Read Out Loud)

1) That’s not right…Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive…Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP…Kum Hia

4) Stupid Man…Dum Fuk

5) Small Horse…Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach…Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped the coffee table…Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8) I think you need a face lift…Chin Tu Fat

  1. It’s Very dark in here…Wai So Dim

  2. I Thought you were on a diet…Wai Yu Mun Ching

  3. This is a tow away zone…No Pah King

  4. Our meeting is scheduled for next week…Wai Yu Kum Nao

    1. Staying out of sight…Lei Ying Lo
    1. He’s cleaning his automobile …Wa Shing Ka

15)

Your body odor is offensive…Yu Stin Ki Pu

16)

Great…Fa Kin Su Pah

A Chinese man decides to move to Australia after 50 years of living
in Shanghai.

He buys a small piece of land near to Mt Isa.

A few days after moving in the friendly Aussie neighbor decides to
go across and welcome the new guy to the region, so he goes next
door, but on his way up the drive-way he sees the Chinese man
running around his front yard chasing about 10 hens. Not wanting to
interrupt these “Chinese customs”, he decides to put the welcome on
hold for the day.
The next day, he decides to try again, but just as he is about to
knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees the
Chinese man urinate into a glass and then drink it. Not wanting to
interrupt another “Chinese custom”, he decides to put the welcome on
hold for yet another day.
A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next
door, he sees the Chinese man leading a bull down the drive-way,
pause, and then put his head next to the bull’s bum.

The Aussie bloke can’t handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man
and says “Jeez Mate, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs?
I come over to welcome you to the neighborhood, and see you running
around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass,
and drinking it, and then today you have your head so close to that
bull’s bum, it could just about ■■■■ on you.”
The Chinese man is very taken back and says “Sorry sir, you not
understand, these no Chinese customs I doing, these Australian
Customs.” “What do you mean mate” says the Aussie, “Those aren’t
Australian customs.”
“Yes they are,” replied the Chinese man,

"so me become true Australian,

I must chase chicks, drink piss, and listen to bull-sh*t!"